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| 3 yrs... |
| 08.15.06 (6:38 pm) [edit] |
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its odd... 3 yrs have passed since the last tim i posted in this blog...
in that time alot has changed, im in college, i met the girl of my dreams, i got engaged to her, i'm standing here, looking at a future so big i cant even begin to know where to start. the last time i posted, i was entrenched in an awekward reality... living days, not life. worried id never find anyone who could love me.
hmm....
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| grrrrrr, arg......... |
| 10.17.03 (9:42 pm) [edit] |
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:evil: people are so assanine. i dont understand why they feel the need to be so confrontational. why are they so rude? you would think that in a society as "civilized" as ours people would act more civily toward one another, but for whatever reason, especially toward me, they feel the need to be rude. am i so insignificant, so unworthy of their presence that they fail to understand that i too have feelings? sometimes i wonder if people have feelings, or if im the only one. but then i dont think its worth my worying about. anyway, just felt the need to vent a bit. even though what he said didnt really hurt me.... not like it would have if it had come from certain people, it still agrivates me. but im done now, so ya, moving on..........
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| dead leaves |
| 09.20.03 (8:11 pm) [edit] |
dead leaves.... i love this band! theyre out of pa and they rock! 8)
Who passed away today
Who's the lucky one?
To live and breathe and die
While on the same day
All the leaves were changing
Black sky tonight
The scene is a pretty one
Sit back, relax
And feel that of a young me
As the wind blows lonely
Forget the times
The man that bloomed of yesteryear
Lay down and die,
Goodbye and share a cold day
With the Dead Leaves falling.
Please call me home before I waste away
I don't want to go back.
www.deadleaves.com check em out!
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| my lil rat |
| 09.20.03 (8:03 pm) [edit] |
i got my new hamster! yay :D i named her lil rat... dont ask, i give things wierd names :P hehe
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| remembering |
| 09.20.03 (7:58 pm) [edit] |
ok... had to write a "memorial" for my global politics class about september 11th. i hate writing about things like this because people are always like "it changed my life so much, that day was just so awefull, ill never forget all those people" and i think its all just a load of crap. i was debating just not doing the paper because i know i would just become disgusted with myself, but i wrote it anyway(needed the grade) and actually im quite amazed at how it turned out.
that day seems like it was just yesterday.... i remember every thought i had.... every fear, but it seems long ago too. my life, the life of the world has changed dramatically since then. i do not know if the events of that day have anything to do with the ways in which i have changed, but i do know that those moments of horror will live with me forever. i remember i was in my second period class -biology- when we first head of the attacks. the principal came on over the pa.... told us that there had been a national tragedy. my first thought was "oh, god. someone's shot the president." everyone laughed at that. i dont know if it was the slightly sarcastic way in which i made the remark, or if everyone was just scarred... but they all laughed just the same. we were told that a plane had run into one of the twin towers... mr moore turned on the tv.... but the cable wasnt working, so we got online to watch the footage there. as we all stood there watching in horror... we saw the second plane hit. i think that was the worst part of the whole day..... the realization that there was no possible way two crashes could be accidental. it was all too horrible. you were glued to it though. you couldnt pull yourself away. between classes, the third plane hit. i think that was the first class i ever skipped. a friend of mines dad and step mom both worked at wright pat... we were all scared the base would be next.... its one of the most strategic locations in the country.... we all knew it would be next. i stayed with her, kept her from loosing it. i thought i was going to loose it... it was so surreal. its hard to think back on that day, on the days and months that followed. they all feel odd, out of place. who would have thought that anything like that could ever have happened? for me, i dont think it was that it happened to us, it wasnt that it happened here. it was just that it happened. i guess that day did change me... in ways i cant even hope to explain. it showed me a side to human existence i dont think i ever really understood before that day. it made me want to change things. it made me want to find out why people felt they had to do things like that, find out how to make the need go away. im sure the world will remember september eleventh for millennia to come, but i have to wonder if it will be remembered in the way in which it should. not for the blood spilt, not for the heroism of so many volunteers, not for the hatred of the few that caused so much pain. none of that is what that day really meant. that day was about realizations, about realizing the divisions that have formed between people, realizing that our world needs to be mended. that is what should be remembered.
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| the memory of trees |
| 09.01.03 (10:16 pm) [edit] |
a poem..... by me!
-let me know what you think.....
[u]The Memory of Trees[/u]
full of life and full of promise rooted in the soils of truth
i stand alone beneath their love
seeking the tomorrows of my youth
i fear the loss of something sacred
i fear the loss of something new
i fear the loss of meaning
i fear the loss of truth
i fear that i shall never mean so much
as to me do you
let us be One now let us be free
let us work wonders for all the world to see
let us fear not tomorrow
let us forget not today
may we remember our courage and forget not the way
a way of truth a way of light
a way of sorrow a way of night
may we march ever onward
till we reach freedom’s door
but even then not to stop
till we are One forever more
coppyright: megan colleen lay
and not that anyone would try to claim my work, but, yes this has been published.... and coppyrighted, so.......
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| why do we wonder? |
| 09.01.03 (9:54 pm) [edit] |
[i]i... hate... everything about you...
why... do i... love you?[/i]
ya, ok.... i just wish i had someone to love..... anyway, off topic, but, hey...........
why do people have the need to wonder about how things came to be... who made it all, why does it matter? why do we have to know? why cant we just be content to exist and be the best we can be..... why does it matter how we got here?
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| *tear |
| 08.24.03 (9:44 pm) [edit] |
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:cry: my hamster bosefus died.... she was a good hamster, i miss my bo.....[sniffle, sniffle] but ashley says i can have another one of her hamster's babies... yay! :P but i still miss bo :cry: i will remember her always....
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| just thinkin |
| 08.24.03 (8:09 am) [edit] |
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:idea: some times i think that religion is so simple that people just have to make it seem more complicated in order to comfort themselves in their own meaningless existences, and other times i think its just so complicated that no human could ever truthfully say that they understand it. i was talking to a friend of mine at a football game friday night and he said that his theory on religion is that he doesnt [i]believe[/i] anything, he just thinks them, because beliefs dont change, thoughts can. ive felt the same way, but i had never expressed it quite that fluently. ive always felt that what i believe is either right or its not, and either way, i would figure it out when the time came. if i come to a poin at which my thoughts are proven to be incorrect, i will disregard them. but untill then, they are my thoughts, and im just thinkin.
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